| | So.... I need to cover a lot of ground in this post because such big things have happened since my last update.
Most importantly, of course, our second daughter, Lydia Jane, was born at 12:37 p.m. on Sept. 23.
Her name is very significant to me personally and I need to make another separate post about that.
But here's the story of how she got here.
Tuesday, September 14 - Went to have the baby girl turned by a midwife because she was breech. I was just over 37 weeks along. The baby turned easily and we were glad that she was finally head down - now we could proceed with our VBAC at home, right? But the ultrasound tech, Debbie, said the fluid was incredibly low and the placenta looked bad. We came away very scared for our baby - not at all the relieved feeling I expected to have after knowing she was finally in the right position to be born.
Friday, September 17 - We had an ultrasound with a perinatalogist to see how bad the situation was. We were fully expecting to be told we could only have this baby in the hospital, and our midwife, Jackie Griggs, even prepared us for the great possibility of having a repeat c-section. Again, we got good news - the doctor said there was plenty of fluid and the placenta looked great. Again, we got to worry some more - he noticed some "abnormalities," one of them being that the baby was really small for her age, which she had been all along.
Still, he made it absolutely clear that we could move ahead with our plans to have a VBAC at home. Again, we left with mixed feelings.
Monday, September 20 - Started losing amniotic fluid. Went to visit the midwife and she said, "Yep, this is it - your baby's birthday will be tomorrow!" Then she sent me home with instructions to call when I was in serious labor. No serious contractions on Monday.
Tuesday, Sept. 21 - David stayed home from work, I took a small amount of castor oil to try and start labor and about noon we sent Susannah to my sister Stephanie's house (we were really sad to see her go!) because we felt sure labor was imminent. Tuesday came and went with no significant contractions.
Wednesday, Sept. 22 - Woke up at 4 a.m. to take more castor oil - a lot this time. Went walking. Discouragement set in - would I never go into labor? The midwife was talking about going to the hospital. Took more castor oil at 1 p.m. - nasty, terrible stuff. Went to take a nap at 5 p.m. and, miraculously, labor started!
After an hour of consistent contractions we called the midwife. She came and said, "This is it! Real labor." She left to go home and shower, take a nap and said she'd come back soon.
9:30 - Midwife comes back. After four hours of pretty intense labor I'm at 1 cm! I'm discouraged and in a lot of pain.
Thursday, Sept. 23 - 12:30 a.m. Midwife says I am at 2 cm. Discouragement, frustration and pain are taking over. I'm really glad to have David and my mom there. But then the midwife dropped the bomb - "I think we need to go to the hospital. This baby needs to be monitored. Her heart rate is falling during contractions and you're too early in labor for that."
And with that sentence my dream of a homebirth ended for good. It had always seemed unreal, even when I was laboring at home, but then I was face to face with the absolute reality that it would never happen.
Jackie said we should go to LBJ General Hospital - a county hospital, not very close, not very well-run, but with a good chance of allowing me to have a VBAC.
I was emotional and in way too much pain to think, so David decided for us to take the chance and go to LBJ.
2 a.m. - I'm admitted to the triage area for the labor and delivery ward. I'm alone. David and my mom are not allowed to come back with me. For three terrible hours I labored alone, on my back, in a very cold room, with a bunch of strangers questioning me, prodding me, trying to figure out why the heck I wanted a VBAC so bad. To tell the truth I was so miserable I had to try really hard to remember why I wanted it and to fight back against their stern, pessimistic warnings.
The only good news they gave me - I was at 5 cm! This gave me hope. Although, I still didn't feel like I could make it much longer without David for support.
6 a.m. Finally I'm admitted to a labor and delivery room and David and my mom are allowed to come be with me. I'm at 6 cm. now.
7 a.m. Anesthesia team comes to give me an epidural. It was NOT the relief I had expected. It took FORever - about 30-45 minutes, and took them about 10 different painful pokes and insertions into my SPINE before they figured out how the heck to do an epidural. I was pretty terrified to realize I was a "practice run" for some student. I was praying I wouldn't be paralyzed.
Sometime after 7 a.m. the doctor says I'm at 7 cm. We had so much hope at this point. It seemed so possible for the first time since we'd arrived at the hospital that I could really do this VBAC.
But for some reason labor stalled. The doctor checked every hour for a couple of hours and I was stuck at 7 cm.
They gave me a low dose of pitocin. Contractions seemed more intense, but I still made no progress. Baby's heart rate was falling dramatically now during contractions.
11 a.m. - Doctor says what I wasn't too surprised to hear "You're going to have a c-section." Doctor left the room and David comforted me while I cried and faced all the realities that another c-section meant for us. All the things I had thought about during the pregnancy, but hoped I wouldn't have to deal with. One of the things I was saddest about was being away from my Susannah. At this point I had already gone several days and nights without her. I missed her terribly. And now I knew that even when I did get to see her I wouldn't be able to hold her or carry her or take care of her the way I always have.
I had known all along this might happen again, but when the moment came I still didn't want to let go, even when I felt God clearly saying I would have to give up this dream. I was so glad to have David with me. My sister Elaine was also there, which was a huge blessing.
David was taking a test shot here right before we went for the c-section - trying to make sure the camera settings were right.
And here's my view of my lover man.
Thursday, Sept. 23, 12:27 p.m. - After a long and scary c-section, we finally hear our Lydia's first cry. She weighs 5 lbs. 7 oz. and is 17.5 inches long. A tiny thing, but beautiful and perfectly healthy.
Our first glimpse of our baby girl.
They kept her in the nursery away from us for way too long. I never let them take her back once we finally got her.
Our sweet baby - with her Auntie Hannah holding her for the first time.
Uncle Joseph came to visit us in the hospital.
I was so grateful to Hannah for bringing Susannah up to the hospital. Her sweet face made everything so much better and easier to bear.
First picture of me with my two girls.
Me and my baby - chillin' during some alone time.
Uncle Noah came to visit.
Daddy loving on his girl.
Beautiful baby.
The happiest part was when we all finally got home and for the first time started our life as a family of four. I was so happy to see my Subee and be home with my lover man and my new baby.
First time in her car seat, ready for her first ride in the car.
Sweet sisters.
First time to sleep in her bassinet - thanks to Christina Garner for the bassinet!
Our first wonderful morning waking up all together in our own home as a family.
We got an awesome fruit basket from one of David's co-workers. Susannah was totally taken with it.
Most especially she wanted the grapes - "See, Mommy?" She was showing us what she wanted.
Success!
Happiness.
(More pictures later. I think this post is long enough. :) )
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| | Posted 10/10/2010 10:51 AM - 92 Views - 2 eProps - 1 Comment
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